MARCH 2014

The Boss and the Mrs took me on another little trip to Torquay. I remembered the extra-large swimming lake that kept running towards me and tasted funny, although this time it tickled my toes and I only went in up to my tummy.  There were lots of other dogs on the sand to play with and I had a great time running around.  We ended up sitting by some pots which the Boss said caught lobsters but after a thorough investigation I confirmed there were none inside although it smelt as if there were!  I got quite excited looking for these Lob-sters, thinking they were into throwing things for me to fetch but apparently I had got the wrong end of the stick, ha ha.  Talking of sticks, I was carrying one home with me that the storm had blown down on to the beach when I suddenly thought I should turn back to make sure the Boss was following.  In doing so I inadvertently caught the Mrs behind the knees with the stick which in turn sent her flying onto the sand which luckily cushioned her nicely and avoided any lasting damage to certain parts of her anatomy.  Once in an upright position again and able to examine her coat, the tumble had resulted in a certain level of mud splatter.  I thought a paddle in the sea would be the best way to clean it off and the Boss suggested a bit of a hose down but the Mrs did not agree and he had to quickly wipe the smile from his face as well as the mud from her coat when she turned down his suggestion in no uncertain terms and requested I instantly be relieved of my stick – spoil sport.

FEBRUARY 2014

I am really fed up - water, water everywhere, inside and out.  Terrible amounts of it have washed away my favourite bones that I buried in the garden, turned my depositing area in a quagmire and made all my favourite sticks too soft and squashy to get a good bite on.  On top of that I have to endure more showers in the white room with the soap suds and woofter perfumes (canine term for dogs who don’t smell like dogs).  I don’t know why they can’t just like my natural doggy smell, but the Mrs insists on me having assisted washing sessions.  I can’t tell you how much I wish it was summer again, although I don’t mind the rain on my coat there is a limit to how much even a dog can stand.  The Boss and the Mrs are having a bit of decorating done by a lovely man called Jon who brings me bones and chews as a special treat for keeping out of his way and his paint pots.  However there was one occasion when my tail became highlighted with a hint of a tint of magnolia and I had to be forcibly ‘coiffed’ with the hosepipe which mean even more water falling from the heavens on to me!  I ask you can’t a brown dog flirt with a little colour now and again?!  Please stop the rain!

DECEMBER & JANUARY 2014

Christmas….that tree came indoors again, very confusing for a dog not to lift his leg…. mind you it was quite prickly and not easy to get to with all the presents and flashing lights around it.  However, I did not disgrace myself or howl with the carol singers and remained favourite top dog in the house.  Actually I am the only dog in the house so I will have to give that statement some thought…. 

Amongst all the wrapping paper and ribbons I found a big bone and had several special bowls of gravy with leftovers to celebrate.  The miniatures of the Boss and Mrs celebrated elsewhere this year so I had a peaceful time with special indoor passes to lay in front of the fire and snooze, something I have noticed the Boss is very good at.  I did attempt to climb on his lap once to check he was actually asleep but that ended in some unexpected upwardly mobile gymnastics culminating in me spending the rest of the evening in my kennel and him staying awake for some considerable length of time despite ‘watching’ the box on the wall, the roaring fire and his hand cradling a rotund glass of spirit instead of my soft head and floppy ears. 

Despite the recent weather, my penchant for all things wet means I don’t mind being outside when the water falls out of the sky, but the Boss gets extremely grumpy about this.  On the other hand, I dislike being inside when the water showers down on me in the large white container with soap, but strangely enough the Boss doesn’t seem to have a problem with this.  Must be why he likes me so much – opposites attract!