Since we last spoke I have had a few visits to the house of the men in white coats and clean smells. The first was because of a near terminal case of the sneezes whereby I couldn’t stop and everyone found it hilariously funny until they got fed up with hearing me and starting taking it seriously. This ended up with me being knocked out and spending time in la la land (a place where dogs always catch clawless cats, bones are plentiful and I share the bed with the Boss) only to be told there was nothing wrong with me except an ‘allergicat’ reaction! Honestly the things these humans make up.
The second visit to Mr Antiseptic was for a lump on my leg which involved another visit to la la land, an ugly shaved patch which I hope will re-grow before my girlfriend Jazz sees me, loads of stitches and having to wear a ridiculous inverted bucket on my head which took six attempts to destroy after the Boss kept mending it. I ended up looking a bit like Frankenstein’s dog with metal repair bolts through the bucket on every side just to stop me eating my stitches, all I wanted to do was give it a good lick.
I have to behave while I am staying away, no digging, no howling and no messing about…..can’t wait till they return.